Disappointing log

• John Oxton
• Wed May 28, 05:47 pm

In retrospect it was probably the faked letter about my inability to do a poo that brought to an end my longish spell of truancy (and exposed my portfolio of previously undiscovered and, therefore, successful faked sick notes). I was 15, I thought they’d go for it. The letter, as I remember, went something along the lines of:

Dear Sir,
John as not been at school this week as he has been feeling constipated.

Yours Sincerely
Mrs. Oxton (expertly faked signature was here)

That, though, isn’t what this post is all about, I was simply reminded of that letter when I was thinking about how hard I am finding it to start blogging again after such a long time.

It is a bit like trying to squeeze out a poo when you are constipated. It hurts quite a bit and once it’s out I know that looking back I am going to be disappointed that for all that pain it was a minor wee log, flushed away, unloved, unnoticed, rather than the nuclear submarine I had hoped would be staring back at me.

I’ll leave you to work through that weak analogy at your leisure.

So what’s the point?

What I’ve learnt is that writing shit down and getting it out in the open is something I enjoy.

I am a human being who has a lot of noise on the inside and getting it out helps me focus on the stuff I should be doing.

Of course some peoples of the internets don’t like noise, they like signal, and some have let me know this in no uncertain terms. I’ve let this get to me. I shouldn’t. They probably just need to have a vigorous wank.

So my rules for going forward:

• Fuck the critics… up the ass. If you don’t like it, fuck off.
• If you want to follow along you are most welcome but first and foremost this is for me.

So what’s next?

Errrr….

• Lost my password
• I have this farty trainer

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